Thursday 28 October 2004

I am no judge

My day was full with mixed feelings. Sad, confused, happy and maybe a little envy. I was told that I am being judgmental over something that I know nothing about. True, I may not know the whole situation but since when an observation becomes a judgement? I agree if you say I have no right to say whose the right or wrong party, and I will shake your hand if you tell me to mind my own business.

That, however doesn't stop me for having my own opinion or for stating the events that happened chronologically. No disrespect was intended but I am sad because things have been misquoted. And things I didn't say were added. Why can't we get it right? People make mistakes all the time, and because of that we grow wiser instead of just older. We learn. I learn from a lot of different people. It's the way to humor and color my life. If I made mistakes, I want to be able to say it out loud. Nothing to fear for because I know I will not die of it. I may be embarrassed but that will slowly pass. (I never thought I could say that. I used to be scared like shit)

Relief is such a great feeling when things you keep inside stumbled out. One thing I know for sure today, is that my bloody gate opened and feelings have been pouring out of me. I am still trying to find my inner strength to guide me to this life journey. And I am sooo bloody grateful for friends who never got tired of lending me their supports (that got me sobbing ridiculously). They may be in a Far Far Away Land but I have them so close in my battered heart.

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