I was chatting with a writer friend while she was writing a masterpiece (which I will post in the 2nd installment), and when it finally arrived in my mailbox, I found myself in agreement with her. What is it about Malay men that are so hopeless... in love and relationship?
I tell you, only a handful of women are lucky to find love with Malay men. The rest of the women population is still looking for men who will treat us in a gentlemanlike manner and at the same time accept us the way we are. If we speak our minds out or have personality and intelligence, don't expect us to change and pretend dumb after marriage. You know, wysiwyg. Accept these characters in us, not running away.
So anyway, with her permission I would like to share the first of two posts because I just couldn't keep them to myself. For lack of better words on my part, I had to post the original version in her own words as I am not good at writing and couldn't come out with better twists and drama.
And I think, you'd be happy to read her posts, after her blogs vanished so fast, which left us feeling void for some times.
Yesterday was a religious day for me. I went for an Aqidah class with Peanut and in the afternoon, my parents hosted another usrah. If I had another class yesterday, I'd be qualified to be a pope, that's how much religion I had yesterday.
But my posting today is not about how I have become an angel. Or the fact that I won a gym membership (yay yay!). It is about my future life with a man.Those that know my family will know that the women in my family are lively. They are also blessed with Malay male spouses that are supportive, but they are at their wits' end when it comes to their daughters' spouses.
After the usrah all the ladies dragged me to Nora's room to lecture me on men and dating.
"You have to date Dato Azmi Khalid."
"Kan dia tu nikoh si Normala Shamsuddin nu?""How old is he Cik Nor?" I asked.
"63."
"Hahahahha, Mummy! Cik Nor nok Dina nikoh orang tua."
"Apa pulak tua? He's very handsome. Now kan ada Viagra."
"He's Bah's AGE. Yucks."
Then Cik Jee spoke out loud:
"Chor (my mum's nickname). You can't allow Dina to marry a Malay man. She is not for them."
What a pandemonium in the room!
I sat there and twiddled my hair. I make a good bimbo you know.
Ever since I became single, there seems to be no end to this matchmaking thing. I went to one and the guy told my friend he was a boobs man. Meaning, Dina didn't have big enough tits for him. WTF?
Two weeks ago, I was told by my male friends (5 actually) that I was scary to men, and that I didn't have the looks Malay men wanted.
I kept quiet because I was curious. All my girlfriends are like me and have decent marriages, so why was I the exception? I'm not that clever, I have 32A tits (though I lie to myself in the mirror and pretend my tits are 34B) and when I put on my Clarins Beauty Flash Balm I look decent enough not to frighten my nephew.
On Saturday, this guy I kinda dated earlier this year called up - we are now very good friends - and he told me,"Good thing you dumped me because we would not have worked out."
"Why is that?"
"I would not have been able to contain you."
I sat in the car and wondered. Dia ni nak letak I dalam tin Milo ke? Dia ni ingat I ni spring ke? Saya bukan rama-rama, saya manusia. Kadang-kadang saya ni monyet.
When I asked Bah-Bah this he said:Bloody fool wanted a maid. He does not deserve you Princess.
Oh.
When I look at my single friends like Ins, Ija, HoneyTar and co, I really wonder why Malay men are scared of them. Yes, they're independent. Yes, they make their own money. A lot of Malay men marry these women.
Maybe they're scared. Because these women have personalities. It's not a matter of having a mind of their own. Most Malay women have their own minds. But having personalities is something Malay men can't grasp.
This morning I showed Bah-Bah a picture of Anderson Cooper (CNN Anchor) who's in Vanity Fair's Best Dressed List for 2005.
"Bah-bah, Dina nok gini."
"Eesh."
"He's clever, tall, handsome and lives in New York. I think we'll make a beautiful couple."
"Mula doh dia ni... you and your angan-angan."
"ABAH! Listen. You have to face the facts: I may end up with someone out of our race or faith. You heard the aunties. And you know it too. How many men are like you?"
"You will marry a Malay-Muslim. No black Muslim. Mat Salleh Muslim."
"How about I make a deal with you? How about celup-Muslim?"
"Are you seeing anyone?"
"No. But just in case la."
"Are all Malay men that bad?"
"No, but for women like me, yes."
"Hmmph. As long as he's fair, tall and handsome.Nothing like your ex."
Opening this to the court...
Coming soon, 2nd part
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